Humans are lazy. We don’t want to work harder than we need to. Especially when it comes to trying to understand something new.
Much of what’s interesting in the world is nuanced. Simplifying frameworks help us “cut to the chase”. We use them at the expense of gaining a deeper understanding.
For example, we often want a quick fix for any relationship issues we’re experiencing. In his book, The Five Love Languages, Gary Chapman has provided an easy approach for couples. Just learn to speak your partner’s primary love language. And BOOM: no more problems!
This is great marketing! The book has over 75,000 five-star reviews. People love it. And his simplifying framework can be helpful. But it’s not a “silver bullet” solution for most of us. Reality is more nuanced.
Researchers at the University of Toronto Mississauga have published a study that indicates where the Five Love Languages framework falls short. Empirical evidence doesn’t show that each person has a preferred love language, that only five love languages exist, or that couples are more satisfied when speaking each other’s preferred love language.
Personality tests provide another example of simplifying frameworks. It’s easy for me to say that I’m an INFP (an Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Perceiving) person. But reality is more nuanced.
Why focus on just these four preferences? And while I may be Introverted sometimes, I’m also Extroverted sometimes. The same is true for the other preferences. I’m definitely Sensing, Thinking, and Judging at times.
Humans like to put other people in boxes like they’re things. While any set of categories may be useful, they also tend to suppress details that often matter.
Here’s one of my favorite quotes.
“Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.”
Albert Einstein
The models we use in physics are simplifying frameworks. We know the world is more complex than the equations we use to represent it. However, physics models often have more power than social or psychological models. (Yes, I’m a physics snob, and I have my reasons.)
This is a topic for another post!
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