Courtesy

“Good behavior” is a social convention that depends on the times, the place, and your specific groups.

I grew up in Colorado, where awkward conversations were often pushed aside in favor of talking about the weather. I encountered something very different in New York, where I went to college.

My suitemates were from Queens, the Bronx, and Puerto Rico. They used a direct style of communication that involved lots of cussing, getting in each other’s faces, calling each other names, and occasional wrestling.

At first, I wanted to be sure I didn’t piss them off. Soon, I realized that they truly cared for each other. The constant jabs were like macho hugs.

The directness of their communication was refreshing!

When they didn’t like something, they let you know. When they had a problem, there was no ambiguity about the source of their frustrations. One of my suitemates took plates and silverware from the cafeteria. He didn’t consider it stealing. He considered it part of his cafeteria fee. Maybe he returned the items at the end of the semester.

I grew up saying “please” and “thank you” in any situation that seemed to call for it. Today, I don’t hear people say “please” or “thank you” nearly as often.

I remember good customer service being the norm when I was a kid; now, I really appreciate it when I receive a good experience as a customer.

Times change. Still, I appreciate courtesy when I see it.