Being vs. Doing

I like to accomplish stuff.

I sometimes worry about living up to my potential.

A lot of my self-worth is tied up with DOING things.

In high school and college, I got good at solving math and physics problems. I got good at playing piano and performing in plays. I got a master’s degree in physics. I celebrated the accomplishments associated with DOING things.

Now, I’m 54 years old, and I’m not as good as I used to be at doing certain things. I can still solve some math and physics problems, but it takes me longer than it used to. I can still play piano, but it’s not as effortless as it once was. In short, I’m still fairly effective when it comes to DOING things.

But the writing is on the wall. My ability to change the world as an individual contributor is decreasing.

In college, I had a physics professor who was STILL doing amazing theoretical research and teaching when he was over 70 years old. It blew my mind!

So, I haven’t given up on my dreams of making worthwhile individual contributions. Nevertheless, I realize that it may be time for me to focus more on letting other people shine.

My ability to influence and lead others may be increasing. And my priorities may be shifting.

In the musical version of Les Miserables, Jean Valjean asks the question: “Who am I?”

It’s a question that has more to do with his identity than his actions. It makes me wonder… Is there more to our identities than the accumulation of our actions?

I don’t have a good answer.

I would like to be remembered as BEING a kind person. I would like to be remembered as BEING a curious person.

But the only way for me to be remembered as a kind person is for me to take actions that others perceive as kind. The only way for me to be remembered as a curious person is to take actions that lead others to believe that I’m curious.

It turns out that BEING is less easy for me to grok than DOING.